I was 17 when I first had sex with another guy (the first half of 1999 was a mad time for me); a friend and then boyfriend, called Richard. He was the same age as me and although we only together for a few days (it carried on for about another 6 weeks, but long-distance), he was my first.
However, although I’ve been in relationship with one or two guys since then, they’ve never really lasted that long (a few weeks at a time), nor have I ever done anal with anyone.
Its not something that many people realise/think about gay guys: Not all of us like anal sex. For me, its always scared me and I’ve never been with someone I trust enough to try it. Its not something I regret by any means, but maybe one day if I find the one for me and I may then be willing to try it.
(You wanted honest and nothing off-limits, well there you go!)
Feel free to keep asking! :)
Yep. And I think this was the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my life. I had no idea what would happen, how they would react, anything. To have to say “I’m Gay” without knowing if I’ll be kicked out of the house, beaten or embraced with love is beyond frightening.
Unfortunately, I came out at school thinking it would be no big deal. A few friends would know, well the class I was in at the time, but that would be it. Within hours it had spread around half-a-dozen schools in the area (was just at time when the first PAYG phones were out so people could text/call each other), and every pupil in ours knew (including my brother who never found it out from me, but has since forgiven me for that).
I had never expected that and as such for the next week I dreaded going home - did my parents find out from my brother, did they overhear someone talking about it in Tesco’s, etc.? At the end of the week, I really couldn’t take it any more.
We all sat down at the table for tea and ate. I said nothing, and afterwards my parents washed up while my brother went upstairs, still I said nothing. Even as my parents when shopping at Tesco’s, and an hour later when they came back I was still sat in the same place, silent. At that point through shear exhaustion, I came out.
They were great about it. Said they had suspected something, but they didn’t care. After a short conversation (which I don’t remember much of) I went up to my room and I think fell asleep.
In fact, later that year both my parents admited it was a little bit of a shock to them, but they knew instantly that they had to support me. My dad even said that after nearly 20 years in the Police, much of which was spent in Central London, he had seen homophobia and the damage and hurt it causes, and vowed to protect me if I needed it. My mother had a few gay friends when she was younger in the 80s and supported many of her friends through difficult times too. They just never expected it would be me that was gay too; I never gave them any inkling that I was that way inclined.
it took a while for them a while to come to terms with it themselves, but they (and my brother) still support me to this day and I love them all with all my heart; nothing has really changed between us, despite this.
Looking back, I was probably around 11 when I started to like boys. There wasn’t a realisation at the time as initially it seamed normal; I didn’t know what gay was nor saw it as a label or understood the significance of liking boys. However, around 12 I moved with my parents to a new town and a new school, and the people there were different. I just got a feeling it wasn’t right; so for the next four years I completely switched off that side of me.
I never had a girlfriend, fancied a girl or really even talked to one. I was friends with a couple of guys through my senior-school years and for a while that was fine. It wasn’t until I was about 16 that my gay side started to push back. Towards the end of 1998 I started to accept that I was gay, especially after speaking with people on-line who were gay as well.
I eventually came out a few weeks after my 17th birthday in 1999 to the school after a bit of a drunken accident at a party forced my hand. For alot of people it was a shock, both for the fact that I was gay and that I had come out.
It was a very different time back then unfortunately and it took me a long time to go from knowing, to realising and then to acknowledging being gay. And although I probably regret not coming out sooner, coming out at school when I did was almost unheard-of at the time, let aloneat the ages some of boys come out at now.
Don’t Like Something?
Don’t like gay marriage? Don’t get one.
Don’t like abortions? Don’t get one.
Don’t like drugs? Don’t do them.
Don’t like sex? Don’t have it.
Don’t like your rights taken away?
Don’t take anyone else’s.
(Source: taylorgangordiebitches)
Possible Anti-Gay Views from an Irish Politician... →
I have no problems with free speech and the right for anyone to say anything they want, even if it greatly offends me; by the virtue of free speech it gives me the opportunity to comment back, now.
But there’s just one issue I have with this particular statement. “Gays shouldn’t marry … Marriage is about the family,” and in fact to quote Lucinda Creighton: “marriage is primarily about children, [the] main purpose being to propagate [and] create.”
If she “supports” Civil Partnerships but rejects that she is anti-gay, I wish to ask her a single question:
“If Marriage’s main purpose is to propagate and create new life, would she support legislation that would prevent straight couples from getting married when they cannot conceive, or annul one if this is found out after the fact?”
To say no would make her nothing more than a hypocrite, whereby she would allow one standard for one set of people and another for the rest, and simply by that, in this context, is she not actually homophobic?
